January 2010 Archives

Ok, well not official.

But it's blatantly obvious.

A few weeks back I slammed Dev Alahan as the most pointless character in soap.

Now after me slating him for never having a storyline the scriptwriters have engineered the return of his ex-wife Sunita.

Hopefully we will now see them sail off into the sunset never to be seen again.

Enough is enough now.

Despite this being a hit with the viewing figures and getting a stupid amount of column inches in the tabloids. Really - it was turgid tripe, yes?

Quote of the week from Davina McCall: "Four men mooing and oinking and neighing at me was weird. I never thought they'd be scared of a chicken."

Putting Davina into the Celebrity Big Brother house was a genius idea, but they didn't exploit its potential. True, the bit where she was laughing with Stephanie was great, but all that pointless running around the house while the bemused housemates, who'd already guessed she wasn't Nicola, looked on was just silly.

She should have revealed herself much sooner, and she should have stayed in the house much longer. Why leave as soon as she was unmasked, before even any conversation? Why not live there for a couple of days until the final?

Talking of which, who do you think's going to win? Alex is the hot favourite, much to my surprise, but then I had no idea Ulrika would win last year.

He has made a success of his time in the house, up to a point. He's shown that he is, on the whole, a nice bloke. But he's also proved he's rather stupid and gullible - all that stuff with Stephen Baldwin when he became his disciple was cringe-making, as was his adoration of Vinnie Jones. Plus he's been economical with the truth, going on about how manipulative the media is when he's sold stories and done his best to become famous.

So I rather hope he doesn't win. I'd like brilliantly snobby but very funny Stephanie or Dane - who's turned out to be intelligent and decent - to triumph, please.

I'm not usually in the habit of promoting other people's blogs, but this one, about Peter Andre's ridiculous demands, is brilliant.

The 3am girls are absolutely right not to give in to the outrageous requests of Peter's people, who are insisting on full copy approval for a puff piece about Costa Coffee.
To suggest they couldn't talk to him or write about anything else but coffee is naive but a sign of the worrying direction in which showbiz PR is going.

We're quite prepared to play the game and give whatever product the celeb is promoting a plug, but they have to play ball too and give us something decent to write about, otherwise it just becomes an advert - and they can pay for that.

We're not prepared to bend over backwards and forget any semblance of journalistic integrity to get interviews with stars, especially ones that aren't really that famous or talented.

It often seems the tightest rules surround Z-list 'celebs' . Those higher up the ladder are more relaxed about their position and don't feel the need to employ bully-boy PRs who make silly demands.

Having met Peter, I know he's a nice bloke, so he should take a good look at his management and consider whether they're really good representatives, or whether he's shooting himself in the foot.

They might as well rename it the National Television X Factor Awards.

The ITV show took over the NTAs tonight, from host Dermot O'Leary to frequent shots of Simon Cowell, and from Jedward performing to Joe McElderry singing AND giving out an award. They even used the X Factor voiceover man, and of course the show was named best talent show.

But I still enjoyed tonight's show. Dermot was a breath of fresh air, not as polished as Stephen Fry or Jonathan Ross but so much more fun than staid Sir Trevor. He was even quite amusing with his jokes.

On the whole, the great British public did well with their choices. I'm really pleased Gavin & Stacey won Best Comedy, they deserved it - and Harry Hill's won quite enough.
As have Ant and Dec, though it didn't stop them picking up yet more gongs.

Lacey Turner and especially Craig Gazey were top choices. I loved the Corrie actor winning Best Newcomer - "I couldn't win a tombola before I joined the show" - and it was a nice touch dedicating his award to Maggie Jones.
It was only right that Corrie won best soap, it's been much better than EastEnders lately.

I don't wish any harm on the Dancing On Ice contestants, but....

I'm sorry lovely Jeremy Sheffield pulled his hamstring, but if it means we get to see more celebs lying near-naked on the physiotherapist's table, it can only be a good thing.

Though if they are going to strip off, it's probably best Bobby Davro has gone.

I said Popstar to Operastar was going to be bad, and I was right. It's one of the worst programmes on terrestrial TV!

Let's start with the horrendous set. They've tried to turn a TV studio into a theatre, complete with chandeliers and boxes, but it's just a baroque nightmare with flock wallpaper more fitting in an Indian restaurant.

I don't understand who the show is trying to appeal to. Those who like pop aren't really interested in opera and opera lovers will think this tacky show is cheapening their art form, and they're right.
What is it supposed to prove, that it's possible to learn to sing opera in a couple of weeks?

It's full of odd-looking characters. Opera singer Rolando looks like a Muppet with that extraordinary hair. Alan Titchmarsh looks like Dracula with his bad hair and teeth.
Myleene Klass, wearing horrible bright pink lipstick, spouted too many terrible puns.
Let's not even mention Lawrence Llewelyn-Bowen and his fatuous comments.

The BBC show Maestro, where they learned to conduct an orchestra, had a bit of class to it. This is just tacky.
The only thing that isn't cheap about it is the cost of voting, at a whopping 50p a time.

They say it isn't over until the fat lady sings, but we can't wait that long. Get it off our screens now.

Jonathan Ross has launched a campaign on Twitter to persuade Channel 4 to bring Celebrity Big Brother back next year.

Writing on his official page, the star said: "Am I alone in thinking that Channel 4 should keep CBB going? This is not me looking for work btw !! But it's a fun show....who's yer fave ?"

Now I think Wossy would be great in CBB, in fact I think next year they should extend the show so it is about 10 years long, send him in the house and not televise it.

You wait years for a BBC drama to be shot in Birmingham, then two come along at the same time.

We now get double the opportunity every week to play 'spot the Brummie location', with Hustle being shown on Monday and now Survivors on Tuesday.

Last night I spotted the derelict Central TV studios off Broad Street doubling for an old hospital, while Baskerville House and the Hyatt Hotel both featured heavily.

Food fans may also have noticed that the restaurant where Greg (Paterson Joseph) had an outbreak of violence and beat up his wife's lover was Piccolinos in Brindleplace. Those circular red banquettes were a giveaway.

SO the woman possessed by a tree lives to skate again, while the woman who wore little more than a few leaves on X Factor was booted off Dancing On Ice.

Personally, I couldn't really care less whether Sharron Davies or Sinitta got through. I'm just sorry that Heather Mills wasn't in the skate-off.

She has clearly gone on the show in a bid to improve her public image. She wants us to forget about her unseemly money-grabbing behaviour during her divorce from Paul McCartney and be reminded about what she loves being famous for - the fact she's only got one leg but bravely carries on and devotes all her time to her charity work.

Sorry, but I still can't warm to her. Her whole demeanour is "Oh, just forget about my disability, it's nothing - except I'll go on about it all the time".

The new series is entertaining enough, but there's lots about it that annoys me. The way it's so drawn out, all the inane waving that goes on, and Jason Gardiner.

Unlike Craig Revel-Horwood on Strictly Come Dancing, who's actually a sweet bloke, Jason doesn't laugh when people make jokes about him. He really does have no sense of humour and his insults are gratuitously mean, saying Sharron is possessed by a tree because her 'angry arms' are like branches.

The show is also packed with cliches. You can play Dancing On Ice bingo and tick off when they come out with the inevitable phrases like "I just want to make my kids proud of me", "this is the best thing I've ever done", "I don't want to let my partner down" and "I'm out of my comfort zone".

The line-up is also predictable. Is it DOI law that they have to have an Emmerdale star in each series - Gaynor Faye, Emily Symons, Linda Lusardi, Roxanne Pallett and now Hayley Tamaddon - and team them with Daniel Whiston?