Who'd want to be down on the farm with dastardly Derek?

Last night's new reality show Farmer Wants A Wife was shout-at-the-telly stuff.

I couldn't believe the cheek of farmer Derek, who was looking for love with the help of Louise Redknapp.

He seemed nice enough at first, and it looked like a happy ending when he picked bubbly Canadian Karla over nice Sarah in the battle of the blondes competing for his heart.

Cue lots of kissing. Then Karla dropped the bombshell that she was going to Australia for three months with her job. I don't blame her for taking the opportunity of a lifetime, but miffed Derek plainly did.

He immediately phoned Sarah and got her back on the farm. Mixing his animal metaphors (what kind of farmer is he?), he smugly said: "Sarah's gone from second best to top dog. She feels like the cat that's got the cream."

Yuck! How awful that Sarah rushed back into his arms instead of saying 'you missed your chance, mate'.

Worst of all, he didn't even have the guts to tell Karla she was dumped. What a cowardly, nasty bloke!