Strictly Awful Outfits

I can barely contain my excitement at the return of Strictly Come Dancing, surely the best show on TV ever.

And this series is shaping up to be as brilliant as ever.

Though that doesn't mean I don't have criticisms, of course. What would the show be if we couldn't shout at the telly? Which I certainly did when lovely Phil Daniels and his infectious giggle was the first to get the boot. That proves what I was saying in my last blog about the inability of the viewing public to make the right decisions. How could they vote for hopeless chef Gary Rhodes to stay?

I think part of Phil's problem may have been the horrible dress that his partner Flavia was forced to wear.

With a sickly shade of yellow and far too many nylon frills, she looked like one of those crinoline ladies people put over toilet rolls.

But it wasn't as strange as the weird outfit sported by Camilla Dallerup. Maybe with two more couples competing, the wardrobe department has run out of fabric. Camilla's dress (?) was like three tiny outfits thrown together - a fringed belt for a skirt, an emerald shirt slashed in half and a bikini top that didn't even match the skirt. A nasty necklace completed the horrible mish-mash.

I worried that Gary Rhodes might have mistaken Karen Hardy, in her bizarre tin foil dress, as a turkey trussed up for the oven. And while male viewers might have been ogling Ola's shapely curves, I bet most female viewers thought she looked a sight in her skintight animal print shiny plastic catsuit.

The men on the show let the sartorial side down a bit as well - Craig Revel Horwood needs a haircut, while Ian Waite, James Jordan and Matt Cutler have gone overboard on the hairspray to keep their bouffant styles in check.

So what else can we complain about?
Bruce Forsyth. I know he's 80, but it's time he retired and gave someone else a go. "I'm not doddery!" he cried, then messed up the delivery of a joke and had to repeat it. Yes, you are. Sorry, but it's not so nice to see you again.