Death by scheduling

Sometimes all three happen at the same time. I think this was the case with Prison Break, the story of a guy who managed to get himself sentenced into the same prison that held his innocent brother so he could break him out. I was willing to go with the thread that the prison blueprints were strategically tattooed on his body, but lost it at some point where one of the low-lifers who had escaped with them was sewing his arm back on with fishing line and without anaesthetic, or something similar. Then the subsequent series ended up on Sky and that was the end of that for me.

You can add Lost, Nip/Tuck and Six Feet Under to that list. I also see that the new series of Dexter is on FX so maybe that's now also off my radar and if the BBC do decide that it's not in the public interest for them to bid against commercial rivals for big shows, then Heroes will inevitably join a growing list of TV programmes that are 'lost' to me.

There are a lot of great shows on satellite channels of course, some of which are very highly-rated. The Wire is one of those, consistently talked about by quality papers, educated reviewers and others I like to laughingly think of as my peers. A lot of people said it was the best TV show ever made. It ran for five years before eventually making it onto terrestrial television. When the BBC eventually screened it they did it on a nightly basis at 11.15pm on BBC2, without repeats. American TV series run for 15 or more episodes, how are you supposed to find fifteen clear weeknights or 15 hours worth of free VHS tape to capture that? Then you'd get a few clear days and they'd move onto the next series: 5 x 15 - impossible. I didn't try.

It reminded me of their treatment of Seinfeld. Bearing in mind that this was the biggest comedy show, one of the most popular TV progs in America (it's a huge country, lots of people) when the BBC bought it where did they put it: 11.15pm - BBC2 - consecutive nights and seemingly random ones at that. There weren't even any 'trailers' telling you where to find it - it was truly death by scheduling.

I know you'll argue that I should bite the bullet and install the dish, but I only watch around 20 hours of TV a week - I maybe concentrate on around half of it. I'm way too tight to spend extra money per month for TV that doesn't interest me and I won't have time to see.

I do have freeview of course, and all the joys that brings - not to mention the constant failure of my Wharfdale set top box and the signal in general. One of my favourite programmes of recent years came via freeview & E4: Reaper. If you missed this, you missed a treat - funny, sexy, well-acted, great-dialogue, good effects, almost always enjoyable. I was mid-way through the second (maybe third) series on E4 the other week when they abruptly announced that it had ended, without any conclusion to the storyline. Apparently not enough people in America were watching it, so the show got cancelled.

Me & American TV clearly don't get on. Luckily at the moment I can stick to Peep Show and Harry Hill's TV Burp - moments of comedy genius. At some point we might start making great drama and action to rival the US again, but I won't hold my breath, or install the satellite just yet.