August 2008 Archives
What happened when a dog, a tap and a tomato had a race?
The dog was in the lead, the tap kept on running and the tomato couldn't ketchup.
What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Finding half a worm ...
What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown?
"Does this taste funny to you?"
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work?
A stick.
A man walks into a pub with a salmon under his arm.
He asks the barman, "Do you do fishcakes?"
The barman shakes his head.
"Shame", says the man, "It's his birthday".
An American Indian consulted his medicine man about a pain in his stomach that had persisted for three months.
"For something as long as that," said the Medicine Man, "I have a more drastic remedy than the herbs I normally prescribe.
"Chew on this leather thong every day. It is 31 inches long: chew one inch every day, and at the next moon come back."
The Indian dutifully did as directed, and at the next moon he returned to the Medicine Man.
"How do you feel?" the Medicine Man asked.
"The thong is ended, but the malady lingers on."
Why was King Tutankhamun considered the best pharaoh in all of Egypt?
Because he always showed up in cuneiform.
Authors
Dale Martin - Staff photographer and self-styled funnyman
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