August 2009 Archives

I cannot believe the male human is packing for another trip away.

When I left home for three days, they put posters up and searched every night.

They also had me neutered.

The poster was embarrassing. The picture was very old and the words brief:

"Missing - tabby, answers to the name Keogh. If spotted, do not approach. Can be dangerous."

They'd even put 'reward' underneath - then crossed it out.

What about gsoh, likes nights out and fish?

They've only gone and put me on a diet, which is a very human thing to do.

What next? Will they shave my fur and squeeze me into a pair of trousers?

It's downright cruel. I've got a good mind to ring Cat Rescue, get them to drop off a hamper and prosecute my owners.

If a diet is forced on you, you're being starved - and a bloke on the front page of yesterday's paper got bird for starving his pet.

Damn! I've said the 'B' word - 'bird'. I've started salivating again.

They're back.

Seven days the humans have been on their 'jollies', whatever 'jollies' are.

They've turned a different colour and their skin is falling off in flakes.

They call it jollies. We cats call it mange.

If they'd gone to a veterinary surgery for a break instead of Crete they'd have been put down.

Read on ...