Why is Kightly The Kitten wearing a lampshade?

By Keogh The Cat on Mar 27, 09 11:18 AM

I thought I'd had it bad, but kitten Kightly, who shares my house along with the humans, has come back from her trip to the vets with, what looks like, a lampshade over her head.

It's to stop her licking herself, apparently, which is downright stupid - we lick our backsides, not our faces. So why hasn't she got a lampshade on her bum? The fleas must be having a field day.

I actually feel a bit sorry for her. She spent the first two months of her life thinking she was a 'he', then the vet admitted he'd got the gender wrong. Miss-diagnosis like that must play havoc with your personality - and, if you're a human, your wardrobe. Thank goodness they decided against calling 'him' Tyson.

If having the big op wasn't bad enough, the same vet got her name wrong. "Kylie Lockley - room three," boomed the voice over the tanoy. All the humans laughed.
Mike had to explain it was 'Kightly', named after a Wolves player. That made the humans laugh even louder.

With spring in the air, I'm hardly indoors: there are cats to see, things to kill.

But poor Kightly's stuck indoors, sporting a bigger bald patch than Kojak. If it doesn't grow back she'll never realise her dream of starring in a cat food commercial, I fear.

On the rare occasions she's let out under the watchful eyes of the humans, she's got that lampshade stuck on her head. Catching mice is a non-starter, but she might have a chance shovelling for moles.

"That's your hunting days done and dusted for a few months," I told her.

"Yes," she admitted, "I'm sticking to a fish diet at the moment."

You've got to be pretty quick on the paw to catch the koi carp in next door's pond. I know. I've tried it. And it's going to be even more difficult with that thing over her head.

"On the contrary," corrected Kightly, "it's a lot easier - I've scooped five already."