Pedigree cats with a bad-ass attitude
What about all the bad press surrounding Bengals, pedigree cats with a bad ass attitude?
They're so bad-tempered one expert has dubbed them asbo cats, which is bang out-of-order. There's only one asbo cat - and that's me.
Apparently, they pick on other moggies, bite and scratch people and cost over ÃÂ£200. I pick on other moggies, bite and scratch people and they found it very hard to give me away.
So where's the sense?
Is it any wonder they're angry? They're a bloody long way from Bengal. They're probably home sick. There's not even an Indian restaurant round here that they can sniff the bins of.
Problem is all these pedigrees are snobs. They may have three or four names and Roman numerals - Princess Shake n Vac III, or the like - and special diets, but they're no better than me. They don't attract a better class of fleas or anything.
They just don't try to get on with us common cats. The Persian over the road is always name dropping about famous moggies she's rubbed shoulders with. I had to gently point out Cat Deeley is a human and the other one she's always going on about is a former goalkeeper.
She reckons she was first choice for the cat food advert, but blew it by being sick on camera. And on shoes and work surfaces.
They tried to airbrush it out, apparently, but only a hard-brush and Domestos would shift the stuff.
There are now more pedigree cats than you can shake a stick at, which is bad news. Pedigree cats go mad due to inter-breeding. I go mad due to other cats entering my back garden.
There's Russian blue, Russian black, Russian white, Napalese black - sorry that's a drug, Siamese, Birman, Burmese, Havana brown, Norwegian forest, which have a tendency to pine, American curl, Mexican wave - sorry, that's not one, Somali, Siamese...
The list is endless and one - the Munchkin - fits in a person's hand. What is the point of breeding a cat that can be picked on by blue tits?
But have you noticed - they're all foreign. How about breeding some Wolverhampton short-hairs?
Heaven knows, I tried hard enough...until they took me for that little operation.